The Lighter Side


Gender | Blimey!! | Have you ever wondered? | Stress Diet | Love, Lust, or Marriage? | Life Gets Tedious, Don't it? | The Class Reunion | Slogans for Women | MEN | IMPORTANT Things To Remember | Senior Lament | Waxing Poetic on Ageing | Abbot and Costello Now | The Stance | Texas Vocabulary | Will Rogers On Growing Older | Favorite Things | Viagraisms | The Unwritten MAN CODE | Think About It...................... | Men You Would Meet In A Man's Restroom | Andy Rooney on.......................... | The Right Side of the Grass | If Men Had A Vagina............... | Why Women Are In A Public Restroom............. | Think About It..................... | My Pills | Carlin Speaks.............. | Creative Writing Class | Marriage From HIS Side Of The Bed | Grandpa Knows Best | That's A Good Idea! | Man O Man | Stan Says.............. | Senior World | Are You Lonesome Tonight? | Go, MOM! | Mom's Special Dictionary | Dear Mr. Milkman................. | A Bad Day??? | Computerized Dr. Seuss | Rover's Diary | What Would You Do If you Had A Penis? | Thoughts On Ageing | Buttons Worn on the Blouse of a Savvy Woman | Just Wonderin" | What's a BITCH? | My Men | Andy Rooney on Women Over 40 | A True Friend | Men | Growing Older | WHAT Kind of Sex? | T-Shirts for Fab Fifties | I've learned........................ | The First Mammogram | I'm MATURE! | Orgasms | Success | My Mother's Penis | Male or Female? | The Stranger In My House | Signs That You Are Growing Old | Ruminations | Mom and Dad | If Men Ruled The World | Bumper Stickers JUST For Women | A Woman's Life | Modern Proverbs | The Secret Of A Happy Marriage | The OTHER Differences Between Men and Women | Love Poems | You Know It's A Bad Day When...................... | A French Gentleman | January | When I'm An Old Lady | Thirty Years | Don't Be A Chicken | 20 Things That You Would LOVE To Say At Work | The ABCs of Aging | Sexualisms | Silly Slivers | Southern Etiquette | How To Tell | A LOVE Poem | The Bare Necessities | Some Little Rules For Living | In 50 Years of Living | Aging | I'm FINE! | Remember? | A Little Advice | A Prayer For Those Getting Older | Female Progression

If you kiss him, you are easy
If you don't, you are frigid

If you praise him, he thinks you are fake
If you don't, he thinks you are ungrateful

If you agree to all his likes, you are submissive
If you don't, you are controling

If you visit him often, he thinks you're desperate
If you don't, he thinks you're not interested

If you are well dressed, he says you are vain
If you don't, you are a dog

If you are jealous, he say's you're possessive
If you're not, then he fools around

If you attempt a romance, he say's you are cheap
If you don't, he thinks you are cold

If you are a minute late, he says you are fussy
If he is late, he says you're impatient

If you visit another man, you are fooling around
If he is visited by another woman, "oh we're just friends"

If you kiss him once in a while, he says you're too shy
If you kiss him often, he says you're too forward

If he fails to help you in crossing the street, he brings up the feminist movement
If he does, he expects to be rewarded

If you stare at another woman, he says you're jealous
If he is stared at by other men, boy, you're in big trouble..

If you talk, it's always too much
If you listen, it's never enough



In short:

So complex, yet so predictable
So macho, yet so sensitive (usually to their own feelings)
So confusing, yet so funny
but most of all,
So irritating, yet so irresistible