If you kiss him, you are easy
If you don't, you are frigid

If you praise him, he thinks you are fake
If you don't, he thinks you are ungrateful

 
If you agree to all his likes, you are submissive
If you don't, you are controling

If you visit him often, he thinks you're desperate
If you don't, he thinks you're not interested

If you are well dressed, he says you are vain
If you don't, you are a dog

 
If you are jealous, he say's you're possessive
If you're not, then he fools around

If you attempt a romance, he say's you are cheap
If you don't, he thinks you are cold

If you are a minute late, he says you are fussy
If he is late, he says you're impatient

If you visit another man, you are fooling around
If he is visited by another woman, "oh we're just friends"

If you kiss him once in a while, he says you're too shy
If you kiss him often, he says you're too forward

If he fails to help you in crossing the street, he brings up the feminist movement
If he does, he expects to be rewarded

If you stare at another woman, he says you're jealous
If he is stared at by other men, boy, you're in big trouble..

If you talk, it's always too much
If you listen, it's never enough

 

 

In short:

So complex, yet so predictable
So macho, yet so sensitive (usually to their own feelings)
So confusing, yet so funny
but most of all,
So irritating, yet so irresistible

...MEN!