The Lighter Side
The ABCs of Aging


Now You Know
Random Thoughts
A Letter Home From A Marine.
The Retrosexual Man Code:
From A Kentucky Woman
Rereleased Golden Oldies
Conspiracy Theory
Finding My Sex Drive
The Side Effects of Viagra
My Mirror
Country Wisdom
Sexy at 60
Poor Dad
A Dieter's Prayer
Stress Diet
Life Gets Tedious, Don't it?
The Class Reunion
Senior Lament
Waxing Poetic on Ageing
Abbot and Costello Now
The Stance
Will Rogers On Growing Older
Men You Would Meet In A Man's Restroom
If Men Had A Vagina...............
My Pills
Carlin Speaks..............
Creative Writing Class
Grandpa Knows Best
Stan Says..............
Are You Lonesome Tonight?
A Bad Day???
Computerized Dr. Seuss
What Would You Do If you Had A Penis?
Buttons Worn on the Blouse of a Savvy Woman
My Men
Andy Rooney on Women Over 40
WHAT Kind of Sex?
T-Shirts for Fab Fifties
The First Mammogram
My Mother's Penis
The Stranger In My House
Mom and Dad
Bumper Stickers JUST For Women
Love Poems
You Know It's A Bad Day When......................
When I'm An Old Lady
The ABCs of Aging

The ABCs of aging:


A is for arthritis,


 B is for bad back,


C is for the chest pains. Corned beef? Cardiac?


D is for dental decay and decline,


E is for eyesight--can't read that top line.


F is for fissures and fluid retention.


G is for gas

(which I'd rather not mention and not to forget other

gastrointestinal glitches).


H is high blood pressure


I is for itches, and lots of incisions.


J is for joints, that now fail to flex.


L is for libido--what happened to sex? Wait! I forgot

about K!


 K is for my knees that crack all the time (But forgive me, I get a few lapses in my M-memory from time

to time).


N is for nerve (pinched) and neck (stiff) and neurosis.


O is for osteo-for all the bones that crack


P is for prescriptions, that cost a small fortune.


Q is for queasiness. Fatal or just the flu? Give me

another pill and I'll be good as new!


R is for reflux--one meal turns into two.


S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears on how to

pay my increasing medical bills!


T is for tinnitus--I hear bells in my ears and the word "terminal" also rings too near.


U is for urinary and the difficulties that flow (or not)


V is for vertigo, as life spins by


W is worry, for pains yet found


X is for X ray--and what one might find.


Y is for year (another one I'm still alive) so,


Z is for zest for surviving the symptoms my body's deployed,

and keeping twenty-six doctors gainfully employed.