The Lighter Side
The ABCs of Aging

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When I'm An Old Lady
The ABCs of Aging
A LOVE Poem

The ABCs of aging:

 

A is for arthritis,

 

 B is for bad back,

 

C is for the chest pains. Corned beef? Cardiac?

 

D is for dental decay and decline,

 

E is for eyesight--can't read that top line.

 

F is for fissures and fluid retention.

 

G is for gas

(which I'd rather not mention and not to forget other

gastrointestinal glitches).

 

H is high blood pressure

 

I is for itches, and lots of incisions.

 

J is for joints, that now fail to flex.

 

L is for libido--what happened to sex? Wait! I forgot

about K!

 

 K is for my knees that crack all the time (But forgive me, I get a few lapses in my M-memory from time

to time).

 

N is for nerve (pinched) and neck (stiff) and neurosis.

 

O is for osteo-for all the bones that crack

 

P is for prescriptions, that cost a small fortune.

 

Q is for queasiness. Fatal or just the flu? Give me

another pill and I'll be good as new!

 

R is for reflux--one meal turns into two.

 

S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears on how to

pay my increasing medical bills!

 

T is for tinnitus--I hear bells in my ears and the word "terminal" also rings too near.

 

U is for urinary and the difficulties that flow (or not)

 

V is for vertigo, as life spins by

 

W is worry, for pains yet found

 

X is for X ray--and what one might find.

 

Y is for year (another one I'm still alive) so,

 

Z is for zest for surviving the symptoms my body's deployed,

and keeping twenty-six doctors gainfully employed.