Seeking Guidance
Excellent Sites with Info on Emotional Abuse
The Dynamics of Abuse
What IS Verbal /Emotional Abuse?
Are YOU Being Emotionally/Verbally Abused?
He uses HIS Guilt against YOU
Hurtful Words
Ask Yourself these questions
How To Spot A Verbal Abuser On The First Date
The Abuser's Body Language
Some Men Don't Realize That They Are Verbal Abusers
Women Can Be Verbal Abusers As Well
Frequently Asked Questions About Verbal Abuse
A Biblical Perspective on Verbal Abuse
Abusive Personalities on TV
Forging Self Confidence
A Positive Attitude
Cultivating Self Esteem
Strengthen Your Self Confidence
Jan Sporri's Tips to Bolster Your Self Esteem
Work On Being Attractive
Help Yourself
Seeking Guidance
Talking To Your Critical Voices
Stress Relief
Take Comfort With You
You Are No Different
When you ridicule ME
Choose Your Words Well
Your Tongue
Verbal/Emotional Abuse Directed Toward Children
Exercise Special Care With Your Children
Defeat Of The Tongue

The following are generalized principles that are applicable for many areas in your life. 

Most often, God sends divine guidance and wisdom through
anointed people and not supernatural signs.

You need wise counsel.

Wisdom is usually gained by successful experience.

Everyone has experience but only a few have successful experience.

Many live in a continual cycle of action then regret but wisdom
either successfully breaks bad cycles or never gets in bad cycles.

It is usually far less painful to benefit from the experience
of others than having to go through it ourselves.  When you
successfully go through something, you usually have wisdom.

Follow these guidelines:

1. Spend ONE HOUR in a quiet place undisturbed.  If the decision involves just you, spend it alone.  If it involves others, ask them to join you.  Take one sheet of paper and draw a line down the middle then draw another line down each half.  Your paper should have four columns.

Most guidance involves a choice between two alternatives.
To marry or not?  To move or not?  To take the new job or not?
To leave or stay?  To buy it or not?  To try it or not?

At the top of the first column on the left put a (-) minus sign.
Put a (+) plus sign in the next column, then another minus and
plus sign in the last two columns.

At the top of the first two columns write alternative one.
Example, "Marry."
At the top of the third and fourth columns write alternative two.
Example, "Not Marry."

During the hour, write ALL of the plusses and the minuses of
each alternative that you and whoever is with you can think of
in the proper column.  Write the good (+) and the bad (-).

The last thing to write on each one is the extreme.
Write the worst that can happen.
Write the best that can happen.

Make a copy of your results.

Study your results.  It's possible that after you look at your
honest answers, the right decision is clear to you.

If not, or if you are not totally sure, then go to step two.
As a matter of fact, it's a good idea to go to step two anyway.

2. Find someone who has his or her life in the condition that
you want your life.
  If you are having relationship problems,
find someone who has been in a happy marriage for a long time with successful children.  Don't ask someone going through major problems themselves.  The advice they will give has a high probability or sooner or later getting you in the same shape they are in.

Remember that important point.

It's not that those in trouble and a mess themselves can't give
you good advice.  It's just that the advice they give you has a
higher probability of getting you in the same shape they are in
so choose wisely where you get your advice.

If you are having financial problems, find someone with their
finances in order.  If you are having health problems, find
someone whose body is in the shape that you want yours in.

3. Sincerely ask them for their advice.
Most often, you will find that people will freely share with you
as long as they sense that you are sincere.  Most successful
people will not want to waste their time with someone they feel
isn't serious and has no intention of really changing.

4. Do what they say.
Understand that if things aren't going right in your life and
hasn't been for a long time, that usually means you have to make changes and what you have been doing isn't working.

If it were something that you WANTED to do you would have
already done it.  Usually the changes we need go against our
habits and thought patterns but that's why we need outside
advice and help.

God sends us guidance but in the vast majority of cases,
it is through a wise person.

Also, make sure that you are under solid spiritual leadership.

~A MountainWings Original~

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