Surviving The Holidays If You Are Widowed
Behind My KeyBoard
Still He Walked
Things Not To Say To A Widow
Coping With Widowhood
Widowhood - A Life Disrupted
How To Be A Widow's Friend
What A Widow Needs
Understanding A Widow
Being A Widow During The Holidays
Surviving The Holidays If You Are Widowed
The Invisible Wife And Mom
What A Marriage Should Be
Women Have Strengths That Amaze...
Boomer Babes Rock
Keep Your Sense Of Humor
Our Christian Founding Fathers
Nancy Ward - A Cherokee Warrior
The Cherokee In Kentucky
The Trail of Tears
In Honor Of All Of Our Veterans
In Honor Of Our Vietnam Veterans
Safety Tips For ALL Women
Reflections In Music


"Christmas is a really hard time for a lot of single people," .  "It's a time when we all tend to be a bit nostalgic. You almost always think about what you were doing this time last year.

"It's bound to bring back memories, particularly when we're bombarded with images of happy families. If you're single you're aware you're not really part of it.

"Even if you get lots of invitations, you feel they've only been issued out of politeness and duty.

"I had a telephone call from a woman only half an hour ago whose husband recently left her. She said she was in the middle of putting up the decorations, but was feeling it was utterly pointless. She said she felt there was nothing to celebrate.


Sound like you?  If so you are not alone.  Here are a few suggestions  that may help.   The most important thing to remember is to not push yourself into doing things that make you feel even more alone or depressed.  Do what makes you feel most comfortable.




It's no use trying to ignore the fact that Christmas is coming simply because you are on your own. Take time to plan ahead so that you have an idea of what you will be doing on each day.

Make a pledge to avoid feeling sorry for yourself and dwelling on the past. Learn to spot the warning signs and take prompt action by calling a friend or going out. Although alcohol tends to flow freely at this time of year, drowning your sorrows is no t going to help.

Don't wait for friends to beat a path to your door. For example, you could take the initiative by inviting friends to a  "left-overs" party.  Prepare a buffet for the main course and invite people to bring a dish of their own.

Welcome invitations to share Christmas with another family - so many people from all walks of life are on their own at this time of year that there is nothing to feel embarrassed about.

If you do prefer your own company over Christmas, plan your TV viewing carefully. Many programmes are likely to emphasise happy family scenes which, if you are newly single, may leave you feeling a little down.

There are many positive and therapeutic solitary activities you can get involved in around the house. These include doing some much-needed cleaning or decorating and sorting out your possessions. It will help you feel you are doing something positive w ith your time.

While you are sending cards, take the time to re-establish contact with old friends you haven't seen for a long time; perhaps go through old letters and address books. This can generate new social opportunities for the months ahead.

You can organise festive outings for yourself alone, or with a friend - for example, going to a Christmas carol concert, midnight Mass or a pantomime or taking an evening stroll to see Christmas lights, followed by punch and nibbles at home. Visit your local church, community centre or library for details of Christmas activities.

Consider doing some volunteer work as it can be very gratifying helping others, particularly if you are feeling a bit low yourself.

Remember - despite the build-up and hype, Christmas only lasts for a few days. Use the opportunity to recharge your batteries, ready for whatever the coming months may bring.

"We are not put on this earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are always there for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.

-- Jeff Warner